Musings from a Full-Time Teacher and Mom
Life is Hard–Cut yourself and Everyone else a Break
Life is hard right now. Even those of us with prodigious organizational skills are struggling to find balance and grace. I started a blog to create weekly, healthy menus to share with the hope of easing the stress of working families. I was going to post a weekly planner that outlined the activities and responsibilities of each kid and adult in the house and we were going to have fabulous home-cooked lunches and dinners with organically grown fruits and vegetables each day. Wow, have I epically failed. I am pretty sure my kids have eaten Mac and Cheese for lunch all week and it came from a box. I add the “I think” because I’m the only one working and going to school outside of the home right now. I’m gone from 7-4:30 each day, and while I would like to say I know what my children are doing, I only have a general, superficial idea. I’m trying to decide if that makes me a bad Mom, and then I realize, that I can’t be everything to everyone, and the fact that they have a box of Mac and Cheese to make, and my kids know how to make it themselves is actually a win.
See, I’m a public school teacher, and society keeps telling me that I need to put school, and teaching everyone else’s children in front of the health and well-being of my own. I spend 9 hours at work each day and then work an additional 2-3 hours each night, and I still have a to-do list a ½ page long. I work Saturday and Sunday and tutor my own kids via phone during lunch. I’m sharing this not to ask for sympathy, but ask for grace and understanding for all teachers. We are not ok, but we are doing the best that we can to create a stable and academically enriching environment for your child–often at the expense of our own health and wellness. I know my situation is not unique, and I know many professionals are struggling to find the balance within their own homes. My hope is that we stop judging each other on what we are not doing, and begin to acknowledge what we are–we are surviving. We might be eating a lot of mac and cheese, but we are eating as a family. We may be connecting via phone, but we are connecting. The carefully crafted plans we made this summer are defunct, but it’s ok. The key is to just keep moving forward and doing the best that we can to adjust to this Brave New World (or 1984–I haven’t decided, yet which is more relevant in 2020). If you see a neighbor struggling, help, don’t judge. If someone is vulnerable and scared of contracting COVID-19, don’t scoff, but show respect by keeping your distance and wearing a mask in public to mitigate transmission. And most of all, know that it is ok to not be ok. Allow yourself the time and space to grieve what might have been and then acknowledge what is. Know that there are only so many hours in the day, and at some point, you have to stop, take care of yourself or you won’t be any good to anyone else. And above all, give yourself and others grace and compassion.
